Samuel Dresner visited his friend, Abraham Heshel, who had suffered a near fatal heart attack. Heschel had gotten out of bed for the first time and was looking weak and pale. He spoke slowly and with some effort, almost in a whisper. You had to strain to hear his words. “I feel only gratitude for my life, for every moment I have lived…this is what I meant when I wrote, ‘I did not ask for success; I asked for wonder. And You gave it to me.’”
Our Gospel story is about one who sought success, and another who asked for wonder; one bound by thirty pieces of silver; the other alive with wonder knowing that life is a gift.
Mary’s brother Lazarus was alive. He had come forth, been loosed, and let go.
The story gives a picture we have grown to love. Martha’s serving, and Lazarus is sitting at the table with Jesus. Imagine Lazarus bird-dogging Jesus, staying close to his friend, Jesus, who had come for him. With her eye on what is most important, Mary enters the room with a jar of very expensive oil. She anoints and softly wipes his feet with her hair.
Her gracious reception of Jesus shows the kind of affection with which we are to receive others, even the stranger in our presence. She kneels at his feet, a lasting vision to shape our worship. This story is more than just a visual delight. The other senses are called into play. Our ears listen for the caring conversation. A sweet aroma fills the entire house.
The world is transformed by the sweet aroma of Christ. Mary loved Christ Jesus with all her heart. She was alive with wonder! Mary Edgar, inspired by the presence of the living Christ and wrote. “God, who touches earth with beauty, make me lovely, too, with your spirit recreate me, make my heart anew.”
There is wonder in Christ’s love. Wonder is an incredible posture for life. When we wonder we live with eager anticipation.
In Whistling in The Dark, Frederick Buechner writes about an alternative posture, the posture of boredom. Acedia deserves the honor of being one of the seven deadly sins. It’s the kind of sin that reaches up from the floor of hell itself and drags you down with it. He writes, “You can be bored by virtually anything if you put your mind to it. You can yawn your way through Don Giovanni or a trip to the Grand Canyon, or an afternoon with your dearest friend. To be bored is to turn down cold whatever life happens to be offering you at the moment. It is to cast a jaundiced eye at life in general including most of all your own life. You feel nothing is worth getting excited about because you are yourself not worth getting exited about” (pp 21-22).
Mary, Martha, and Lazarus are anything but bored. Picture them living in anticipation, newfound readiness, eagerness and openness, learning with the living Christ. Sadly, some never learn— they have no openness for anything new. The Gospel storyteller makes it clear, this is a moment to be alive with wonder, instead, Judas Iscariot is getting ready to betray him for thirty pieces of silver.
It can be easy to miss ah-ha moments. Rather than being alive to new truth, we keep retrieving that which confirms our biases. We cannot see the forest for the trees because our preconceived notions are stacked so high. Our reasoning is locked tight by rigid conclusions. We must watch where our presuppositions take us. To test what we think, we must watch what our thinking produces, how such thinking plays itself out.
Baptists have long believed in learning. Spiritual formation is not just about information, but it is about transformation; about becoming. Baptist seminarian, John Broadus, stopped to visit a man who didn’t think much of learning. He challenged Dr. Broadus, “God don’t need your education.” Dr. Broadus’ replied: “That may very well be true, sir, but God very likely doesn’t need your ignorance, either.”
The point is: God can use a mind that is open and prepared and ready to learn and grow in experiences like this ah-ha moment at the table with Jesus when we can, make new friends, expand our minds, warm our hearts, and use your gifts. Becomers are life-long learners!
We can learn from Mary’s example! Her passion encourages us to focus our attention and explore our wonder in the compassion of Christ. We can too easily be tied up by the struggle with things that are urgent. Life is better served when we have an eye and an ear for that which is important. The urgent alone, exhausts; the important inspires. Judas feels tired to me! Mary feels alive! Anointing Jesus seems like an extravagance. We shy from such luxury. We fail to recognize opportunities when our life is consumed by urgencies. Urgent matters act on us and bring pressure to bear. The urgent is often the most popular. I have a friend who calls this “the tyranny of the mood of most.”
However, the important considers what is to be valued, and requires more initiative, more intentionality, more courage to say no to the host of things demanding so much from us so that we can never say yes to that which is burning inside.
A whole pound of expensive oil had been generously poured out. It was the equivalent of a year’s wages. This appeared to be an act of extravagant waste. It was instead a decisive act of love preparing him to pour out his life.
This is a Gospel story that enlarges the horizons! I am reminded of the time Will Campbell, the self-described “Boot-leg Baptist Preacher” in Tennessee, received a call from a priest in New Jersey who wanted to come down South and join him. Will’s ministry seemed to be so important compared to what he was doing. Will challenged his presupposition. “Where are you now?” “In a pay phone booth in Newark.” “Is it one of those glass booths?” “Yes, it is!” he puzzled. “Are there people out there or are the streets deserted?” “There are lots of people.” “Well, son, that’s your ministry, now go to it!”
He offered him an enlarged horizon that was given context by that which was near.
God resorts to the oldest trick in the book and hides the kingdom in plain view. Kingdom ministry begins by responding with eager anticipation to the presence of God in your midst. God’s kingdom is often in the last place that we look; the surrounding circumstances of our everyday lives. Kingdom ministry: suffers the children, responds to the persons we encounter, gives attention to persons in need.
Theologian Paul Tillich had a phrase that might explain wonder, what he called, “ecstatic reasoning,” the intersection of the immediate with the ultimate, the horizontal with the vertical. In other words, what is going on right now can be informed by our consciousness that God is “going on” right now. Whatever is happening in the present moment, God is also happening. Mary understood ecstatic reasoning! Rabbi Heschel shapes it for us. “I did not ask for success, I asked for wonder, and You give it to me!”