The story of the feeding of the 5000 made a deep impression upon the gospel writers. When their beloved community found themselves up against a problem, they were drawn to tell this story.
When Jesus heard about the death of John the Baptist, he withdrew to a deserted place by himself. He gave himself room to grieve and reflect upon all that awaited him in Jerusalem. John’s death is difficult for Jesus to absorb. It may have provoked questions about the eminent nature of his own death. Like Herod’s daughter, this world can ask for more than it has a right to ask.
Hearing of John’s death the crowd came to Jesus. John had been urging them to do so, and now they came seeking him. I wonder if our efforts to point people toward the Son of Man are equally sufficient. Would people we know realize they can come to Jesus in moments of need?
Jesus withdraws to the other side. When he meets the crowd, he is deeply moved and offers them his care. One of his disciples says, “This is a deserted place, and it’s getting late. Send them away so they can go to town and buy something to eat!”
Jesus told them, “They don’t need to leave. You can give them something to eat!” They replied, “We have nothing!”
We understand so well this theology of scarcity! Our greatest fear is that we do not have enough.
Years ago, we watched our 13 year old nephew take his turn at bat, late in the game. With his team behind, and runners on base, Taylor had the opportunity to create a delightful story. His younger brother, Drew, was watching; not missing a thing, leaning into the backstop. When Taylor stepped into the box, Drew began to work on the pitcher with life’s most threatening cadence, “Hey, pitcher, you’ve got nothin’!” First one pitch and then another, and Drew kept laying it on and until he rattled the pitcher! Taylor got a solid hit and knocked in the winning runs!
“We have nothing,” they said, “except five loaves and two fish.” Clarence Jordan in the Cotton Patch Version of the Gospel makes this sparse amount even more pitiful, “We have nothing, but five boxes of crackers and two cans of sardines!”
To Jesus, these resources were not nothin’! He says, “Bring them here!” He tells the people to sit down on the grass, and takes the bread and the fish, and lifts his eyes to heaven, and blesses and breaks the loaves. He gives them to the disciples to share until everyone has something to eat! They dine sufficiently. They have plenty. They have all that they can hold and 12 baskets left over.
God has filled them with the finest of wheat (Psalm 147:14).
The world can be fed with that which we discard every day. We are called to a ministry of scraps, on the one hand, and to a ministry of giving our best, on the other. Twelve baskets, one for every disciple; it is an object lesson.
“What good is a desert?” Kathleen Norris writes in her book, Dakota, “A desert is where gifts appear!”
I recall the bewildering moment when we were young and seven months pregnant. Early in the morning we were awakened by my brother calling to tell us our father had taken his life. The world was tumbling down as we boarded the small private plane to fly home from Hereford, Texas, to Enid, Oklahoma. I kept thinking, “This is not happening. There is no way to comprehend this.”
Numb, we flew in silence. Who has resources to handle this? How do you take your young wife with child into such devastating darkness?
All we could do was hold each other’s hand.
I can still see the grain elevators in Enid as they begin to emerge on the horizon. “I’m curious,” I asked the pilot, “how far out are we?”
“A little over 60 miles away.” Approaching, they grew larger than life.
Circling to land, an unexplainable calm came over me. “I’ve decided, when we get home, we’re going to put things in motion to move to move to the seminary. Life is too short to not do what we need to do!” This came from out of nowhere.
Jesus and the disciples are up against it and must attend to the hunger of the multitudes. The disciples suggest otherwise. They feel the best part of the day is gone and there are not enough resources to make a difference.
Those pressing for a different outcome could deflate for Jesus, but instead, the needs of the people bring out the best in him. He discovers enough is already present to meet their needs.
Interestingly, Matthew does not say where these provisions originated. There is no little boy sharing his sack lunch.
Jesus begins with what they have, and there is more than enough left over. First there is nothing, except negativity, disappointment, impatience, and scarcity, but the story does not stop there.
Jesus resists the temptation to shrug it off. He does not say, “Trouble’s coming. You go your way, and I’ll go mine.” He faces the situation squarely and decides to hang in there, the reverse of “church-lite.” For Jesus, the way out is the way through. The solution lays on the other side. He does not exit but leans into the challenge. John Claypool is known for saying, “Good news comes by facing the unwelcome news.”
Sir Thomas More, in the sixteenth century, wrote Utopia, about an imaginary island, a place of perfection. The title, however, is tongue-in-cheek. The Greek word means “not a place.” There is no place that without struggles.
Jesus chooses to cope and not to run. He takes inventory of what God has already given. The equation begins, “We have nothing here, except….”
When I am in a meeting, and someone says, “Here’s a stupid idea!” It is delightfully surprising when just a stupid idea turns out to be the very thing that is needed most? That is why we begin by looking for what is going for us amid all that is going against us. It is the tipping point (Malcolm Gladwell) because little things can make a substantial difference.
During an oil downturn in Oklahoma, a woman in our church had lost a great deal more than many of us together will ever have. It was devastated. Her inventory of loss was well-rehearsed. It was enough to make you cry. One day she came to talk. I noticed her composure had changed. Despite her losses, she realized she had more than enough.
Jesus discovers that which God has already provided.
And with that it sounds so simple to say, “He begins!” He starts there. It is the way of gratitude. We want to walk this way. (Steve Box story!)
Though it seems only partial, he takes the five loaves and the two fish, and looks up to heaven. He stands tall in gratitude. It is a theology of enough.
It was only a very few years ago that I made sense of what had happened that afternoon on that little plane. On a retreat at Big Bend National Park, Belden Lane, author of The Solace of Fierce Landscapes, encouraged us to explore our manna experiences; those times when we discover needed resources that God has already provided.
Suddenly, I could make sense of the reversal that had come over me on that flight home. At a time of utter bleakness, the grain elevators were pure manna. Emptiness was filled. I could trust there is enough and begin moving toward the very thing to which is leading. Two short months later our son, Jeff, was born, and we were called to Royal Lane. You were bread in the wilderness!
There is enough with which to begin.
We pray: O God, we are pilgrims, who live in the land of plenty but still know emptiness, hunger, and longing.
Forgive us for not wrestling through the issues of our existence until we come to see your provisions.
There is enough love, grace, and power, something more than scarcity.
Fill us with the finest of wheat! In Jesus name, we pray. Amen.